Be the calmest person in the room

Are you aware it is 100% up to you to be calm?

All your reactivity is learned. When your mind is reactive, it is hard to stay calm. However, your core essence isn't reactive, angry, stressed, or anxious.

Your essence – your True Self – is calm. Your essence is silent observer that has 3 simple qualities:

• I am;
• I know that I am;
• Certain subtle energy flow (primordial/omnipresent flow).

It is your True Self who can use awareness and sensing at will. Your ego can't do that as it runs on subconscious 'autopilot' mode. It is noisy and after novelty instead of being silent and calm.

On this mind health website, you can learn how to be the calmest person in the room.

Once you understand your inner domain, you can easily spot irritations and distractions in your mind and deal with those before they turn wild and cause problems. To achieve this you take time to invest in learning awareness-based intrapersonal skills. Such inner skills are with you for life.

Only excellent awareness-based self-leadership skills give you the power to be calm, regardless of the situation.

Excellent intrapersonal skills always allow you to be the calmest person in the room!

Marcus Aurelius stated, "Being prepared for the unforeseen is not about predicting the future, but rather cultivating the inner strength to face whatever comes our way with grace and resilience."

Conscious response vs inner reactions

A calm person has a choice to choose how to respond. This is the ultimate inner strength.

A reactive and irritated person, on the other hand, cannot remain calm in potentially irritating situations.

Only a calm mind fully owns the power to stay sharp and well. Luckily understanding your inner domain is possible.

The key is to understand that you are not your mind.

Why it matters?

First, the term 'mind' in English is extremely vague. It means everything within your head, and on the other hand, it means nothing certain that you can lead. The problems start as the term 'mind' means different things to different people and is therefore one of the most misunderstood words in the English language.

Second, your mind has different processes in it and you need to become aware of those to be able to lead them. You are not your thoughts, imaginations, emotions, desires, fears, or even your physical body. If those processes pull you to identify with them, you will lose contact with your True Self and inner calmness.

Only when you are calm and use the support of sensing and directed awareness, can you become able to lead your thoughts, imaginations, emotions and physical body. Your inner layers and physical body (with yellow on the graph below) are your tools and you can have full power over them. So, you need to be the leader of those domains to have real freedom and self-mastery.
 

It is worth noticing that the silent True Self has 100% power over your inner layers, but only limited ability to influence the world around it.

Without being centered in your True Self and training your intrapersonal skills, your inner layers and physical body tend to run on a subconscious 'autopilot' mode. That is why intrapersonal skills are a must and inner calmness or inner silence is the needed background for successful self-leadership and influencing processes consciously in the physical world.

Learning self-leadership and improving mental wellbeing makes sense for employers. It is an excellent investment opportunity with up to tenfold ROI that also secures mental wellness and allows one to take more personal initiative.

The result of such intrapersonal education investment is the improvement of conscious action and achieving mental wellness and inner calmness.
 

You too can learn how to become calm

As stated, the starting point of this journey is an acknowledgment that you have a mind.

In reality, the different processes in your inner domain keep your mind more occupied than the external stimuli.

An untrained mind is always after novelty. When untrained, the mind keeps running for the strongest stimuli and it quickly gets bored when such novelty is lost.

Remember a meeting where you sit and a person arriving late walks in, you automatically look and lose track of what was said in the meeting. Is it so? Has it happened to you?

Can you recall a meeting that turned out to be long? How often your body was sitting there, but your mind wandered around and planned a holiday, or some other event not related to the actual meeting at all. Or were you thinking about something that was disturbing you in your life and missed whatever was discussed?

Once you know that you are not your mind and gain intrapersonal skills to observe and lead different inner processes you can become present.

Only conscious choice can replace mind wandering with being fully present and remaining focused (see the image below).
 

Learn the right inner perspective

You have thoughts, imaginations and emotions that make up your mind. When you add subconscious habitual patterns you have very little control over your life. Your train of thought runs wild, and your emotions are influenced by other people's emotions, situations and activities more than by your own conscious will.

You have learned your thoughts. Try to think of something you don't know. Can you?

You have learned to use or misuse your emotions. Mostly you let emotions appear and leave you as you lack mastery in using them or letting them go as opened up in this blog and book. Thus, your 'emotions run you'.

When you don't lead your inner processes you run on subconscious autopilot mode and lack inner freedom.

Only when you take time to discover your inner processes and find inner calmness between those processes and your core essence, you can become the master of your thoughts and emotions.

When you start leading all intrapersonal processes you become empowered and able to lead your awareness at will. This will allow you to enjoy a greater amount of inner freedom and also keep your energy levels higher. As a result, you will be less anxious, worried and stressed.

Such inner freedom allows you to stay calm, stay focused and perform well. It also allows you to become more insightful and creative.